When You Feel Stuck;

Just Start.

Start Messy.

Start Loud.

Start Scared.

Start Small.

Start without knowing who you are or why you are or where you are going,

Raining or snowing put on those shoes and start moving.

Start throwing paint at the wall

What sticks will start showing a piece of a part of a whole that keeps growing

And growing and growing.

Because you’re eroding those walls to the knowing

That in you is power and purpose exploding - devoting those votes in your favor

Recoding each synapse to grasp at the fact that you’re glowing

Out with it all now, keep going, keep going

Then Stop.

Or Get Stopped.

Hit the wall. Trip and Fall.

Freeze Up. Break Down.

Gas out. Get Stomped.

To the ground.

Collapse.

You’ve reach a Dead End.

In the darkness… relax.

Know that it’s only a human relapse.

The pauses are part of the process, perhaps

Failure is progress just wearing a mask.

The inner you knows it’s own worth,

That’s a fact.

Dust the dirt off your shoulders and get up my friend.

Don’t give in and drown in that darkness, instead

Give thanks that you’ve still got a choice and a chance

Until you give up it’s never the end

Find your feet and your paints and

Just Start. Again.

The Simplest Act / The Hardest Step

As a human being attempting to do anything of meaning in this world, trouble at that starting line is going to happen. A lot.

Creating art, changing careers, connecting with strangers, repairing a relationship, starting a project - that inner barrier will be there. Unseen but always felt, a solid wall of doubt. This goes double for picking yourself up from rock bottom.

You know what you need to do, or even if you don’t you have a vague idea of which direction to go and steps you need to take to get on the road. Despite this our brains have the audacity to stop us dead in our tracks, or running in circles. We end up chasing our tails, going down rabbit holes, hiding under the covers, and doing anything else but doing the damn thing.

This has terrible knock-on effects for our lives:

Tasks pile and pile up, compounding until they become a mountain.

Bit by bit we lose confidence and trust in ourselves to handle those tasks.

And our goals get further and further away until the gap becomes a chasm.

We end up stuck in the same spot for days, weeks, years, a lifetime.

What keeps us from those crucial first steps?

What Stops Us

If you’re anything like me you’re a chronic overthinker, over-analyzer, and over-indexer. A downright restless mind and worrywart. Over the years I’ve learned to hide it well enough. Calm waves on the surface but underneath is a roiling ocean of concern.

This has not been fun to deal with.

I’ve felt it with every big decision, every new venture, every piece of art, every person I’ve ever met. Analysis paralysis has held me back in my creativity, my career, my relationships. It has cost me countless opportunities and will continue to do so until I am able overcome this self imposed barrier.

There are lots of names for this barrier - Resistance, Procrastination, Approach Anxiety, Self-Sabotage - each subtly different but all stemming from the same place.

Fear. Fear of Failure. Fear of Judgement. Fear of the Unknown.

We fear moving forward because we have this deep seated aversion to making a mistake, making it in public, and disappointing ourselves again. It is our mind and bodies way of signaling danger, avoiding pain and keeping us safe in our little cocoon of comfort.

The pain of our prison keeps us small, but at least it’s a pain we know. But you and I both know that’s no way to live. Living requires breaking free from our limitations, and breaking free requires starting.

How to Pull the Damn Trigger

Here are a few ways to Start:

1. Start Where You Are You’re at the beginning. You don’t need to know everything. You need to be open to asking questions, to being curious, to accepting the answers that come.
   

2. Start Messy You want to make perfect first move. There is no such thing. The only wrong move is no move at all. Embrace the inevitable imperfection of your first steps. Enjoy making a mess.
   

3. Start Failing You are going to fail. You’ll try things that don’t work. The solution is in reframing failure as learning rather than setback. Put in the reps. Over time iterative action will lead to experience.
   

4. Start Small So small. Your goals are big because you’re ambitious. Your ambition will cripple you, and your goals will feel daunting. Break your goals down to the size of atoms. Start so damn small it’s impossible not take the first step. Maybe you’ll end up taking two.

Why Starting Matters

Starting brings Clarity. You don’t know what you don’t know. And you won’t know what you don’t know until you step into the unknown. The fog will recede by inches at first, but the more you walk the more you will see until the path becomes clear.

Starting builds Momentum. Each tiny step brings on another. Each steps gets progressively easier each time. Soon your tiny steps will become a walk and your walk will become a run. Then you’ll be moving as fast as the wind wondering why you held yourself back from moving this fast.

Starting builds Trust. When you show yourself that you can take even the smallest action you lay a brick of self belief. Those bricks are the foundation of your self confidence. Seeing yourself as a competent individual over time will bring a level of self reassurance that will affect every part of your life. As your concept of your self improves you may find that the world responds in kind.

Starting will have so many compounding benefits for your life, you won’t even recognize yourself a ways down the road. Starting won’t destroy your fear entirely but it will go a long way to solving whatever situation or problem you are facing right now.

Right now I find myself unemployed, feeling several miles behind in life, and dealing with a very familiar depression each day. I’m starting this because I want to share my journey of recovery from a fairly dark and confusing time in my life. This is as much a reminder to myself as it is a message to you so I hope what I share here can help in some way or shed some light on your own path.

If you want to see your dreams for your ideal life become reality then you must begin. They will only move towards you as much as you move towards them.

If you don’t move they won’t either. So Just Start.

A*xo